My warm wet tongue tinkers my gray matter,
Eyes wide bulging with veins, screaming in silence,
My mouth smiles but fangs would have borne the suit better,
My hearts shouts but my conscience is dead already.
Who would know the truth in my gaze? The lies in my breathe and the envy in my comments?
” My best friend’s fiancé.”
I know the meaning of the word...or do I?
Is that my Id taking over? Was Freud right? Am I just a civilian beast?
Why is my heart beating so fast? I know it would but a fleeting moment…a touch…a kiss…I swallow. Hard.
Maybe she heard me. Maybe she knows. Maybe he knows.
Get up and go. You were never here and it never happened. You still have the time to make this right.
How did the voice escape? What is that jumble up of frequencies? Why is my throat so dry? I can’t see clearly anymore.
Everything is naked. When did this happen? Why?
It’s not right. Who decides? It could be…you have to try…you will never know until you try.
She leans forward. She understands my stress. She has come to relieve me…to release me…the outlet hath cometh!
” Don’t even think about it,” she says.
Nothing suffocates like shame.