Sometimes, I wish I could drink sea water.

(As of the publication of this post, water has started flowing in my hostel. Here’s the caveat: it flows only from about 1AM to 4AM every two days. I get to sacrifice sleep for H2O. Great.)

This is bullshit. Where did all the water go?

I have lived in Molyko, Buea for the past 7 years. 7 bloody years and never have I spent a week in such a nasty predicament.

“My line is different from the others across. But, it seems the others too have the same problem. But your neighbors say….also I have heard that…you see…”

When my landlord (cum caretaker) was trying to explain why our taps had not been flowing for the past 7 days, I was feeling way too sleepy to quip or prod further. Added to my stoned mood was the fact that I had, at the time, a 60 liter drum half filled with water I could use to take a bath and …er…do other stuff.

So, I wasn’t bothered. Dumb me.

6 Days Later

All my clothes are dirty. My toilet stinks. I have no idea how I will take a bath tomorrow morning and I have a Continuous Assessment at 9 a.m.

And oh, did I mention I don’t have water to drink either?

What is wrong with this town?! Seriously! WTF??

I pay rents (actually…er…my parents do). Everyone who lives in a hostel pays too! When #ENEO does its epileptic electrical display of force, all we can do is complain, eat and sleep. At least, you can smell nice while complaining. I would not wish to have written the G.C.E this year. Goodbye to late night revisions…

What happens when I can’t wash my pots, cook, take a bath and eat BEFORE being disgruntled?

If it were a hostel issue, we would probably have burnt our landlord on a stake by now.

Who do I complain to? It’s rainy season (or is it?); the breeze snickers as I bundle clothes over my shoulder. A tactile reminder of the true color of ‘the town of legendary hospitality’.

After spending a day in school; exhausted, hungry and in need of a shower, what do I get?

A stuffy room and a mound of laundry. I don’t even know what the hell I will wear tomorrow.

What sort of bullshit life is this? Who do I hold responsible? Do I buy mineral water to do LAUNDRY with?

They say ‘Water is life’. Really guys? Really? Water WHICH I DON’T HAVE is life?

I suppose I am lifeless now.


This is frustrating. Take away all the electricity you want. In fact eh, take away my already debilitating internet access.


A holed bag of tricks

If I don’t get water tomorrow, I have a couple of options:

  1. Crumble of insalubrity like a pillar of salt.
  2. Recycle piss, sweat and saliva. I know it’s not going to work. But, ‘When there’s hope…’
  3. I have no third option.

I don’t know what to do. I don’t have water to take a bath, do laundry or even drink.  I’m essentially, screwed.


Oh wait…even that I can’t do.



  1. Awesome piece with a lot of gorrryyyyyyyyy details. One would think you are making it up but I know you are not coz I’ve been there done it. Buea water crisis sucks rotten eggs. I used to go to Biaka to solve that problem…Ndongo river can help – just put Javel in it and let it sit for a while…but beware, moutmout no di sleep!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I know?! Now the thing flows when I am supposed to be sleeping and I have no choice than to wake up and carry…at 2 AM! Chai. I don’t live with a pulic tap in proximity. So, sleep sacrifice it is.

      Liked by 1 person

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